I just googled maps his house, and took the virtual tour back to my apartment, just so I could visualize the walk of shame in the morning
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
You threw a bottle at the bartender and then stole his tip jar. However, you were quickly KO'd by the bartender. Solid right hook.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
So I just sneezed blood everywhere. On the upside. After yesterday I feel way more confident AND I give even less of a fuck.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
I'm sitting alone in a bar pretending to watch football because I don't know where the liquor store is around here and I'll be god damned I'm going to be sober on my day off.
Just in case you blacked out, we had sex, you came in me, we need plan B, we fell off your top bunk, broke your roommates chair, i still like you, but i'm in pain and am going to bed
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
i woke up on someones kitchen floor, and i used the gps in my phone to find my way home. im really glad you forgot about me.
All I have in my purse is 10 cents and a plastic ducky.\nI can't explain last night.
I don't want to hook up with him sober. That's pretty much like saying I love you.
Randomize