I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
it was the worst sex ever in the history of sex. i mean ever. and he thought he was great. actually told me he was the best id ever had...what was i supposed to say? lol...i've had better times by myself. seriously.
i think i just puked on my phone
we live great lives
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
I remember fighting the chubby dude and the bouncer put me in the full Nelson. Woke up this morning with a dislocated shoulder. We need to finish the rest of this beer though
dude you said you were going to be a human flag and climbed the telephone pole and fell in front of a car
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
I'm looking at some sugar baby profiles to get some insight on what we're up against.
Can I please come dance in my bra to destiny's child with you? I'll bring the wine and the glitter
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
took shots off of a myriad of fake boobs last night. It was glorious.
I shaved my entire vagina for a man who had the personality of a potato and a C- orgasm. Life is a series of disappointments.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
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