At my boss' house at a bbq. Had a few beers. Taking a poop - there's no TP...this is my nightmare.
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
it was really bad. he went around saying "I want you inside of me" to everyone.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
Should I be alarmed that you're a regular enough at a bar to show up in sweatpants?
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
You were walking away to pee and as you were undoing your belt you looked at me and said "the belt is off. the game is on. Remever that."
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
Watched an eagle swoop down and eat a rabbit on my walk back from your place, literally too high to handle this right now
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
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