i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
I just googled "whats above a trillion", thats how busy I am at work.
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
drunk enough to think that masterbating in the pool is an awesome idea
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
stop bragging. last time i got laid i got double pink eye, and it was so not worth it
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
Like her Facebook page isn't even hers. It belongs to her tits. It's Titsbook
I think sneezing out coked up boogers onto your professor disqualifies you from the "I was sick" excuse
All three of us got laid last night. This is what is commonly referred to as the Trifuckta.
She's got Mike in the bathroom. He's covered in meat.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
Look, he's a hot korean guy with a motorcycle and a great ass. I'm gonna do head-titingly kinky shit with him.
Randomize
