Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
I remember saying "sorry" to the blunt before throwing it out the window
i made potato chips in weed oil. what did you do today?
Let's make a pact to never get in a cab at 3am together unless it's to go home or for pizza.
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
reason #1 why i should never live alone: i haven't put pants on since she left 26 hours ago. and ive made spaghetti 3 times.
You ate my pie without asking. So don't get butt hurt if I send you link to plus size clothing stores.
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
good news: i got laid. bad news: by your boyfriend
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
because he's a firefighter, wouldn't sleeping with him be like saying thank you to the community?
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
