dude, wtf is with her now? she has stuff up about how i am kicking her while she's down
wtf? who are you bitching about me to now?
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
Forever 21 now has a maternity line. Even more of an incentive for me to get pregnant at a young age.
I was greeting people at my door feeding them jello shots out of an ice cube tray with a spoon.
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
The entire time I'm blowing him she's in the back seat lecturing me on the reasons why you're not suppose to do that while they're driving...
thing about being the result of a teen pregnancy is that all my baby pictures are of my mom and dad holding me around their stoned college friends.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
But see that's the thing. I know i'm better looking than you, I just want you to be continually in a state of shock and awe that you could ever get a girlfriend this hot. You know?
I wanted to make out with that blonde just so I could deck her boyfriend and make things interesting.
At least that would be something.
We just fucked each other sober. #goteam
Why is there an inflatable flamingo in the backseat of my car?
Randomize
