There was a point where some of my friends attempted 'moi's', which stands for makeout on introduction.
It involved going up to women and very aggressively trying to make out with them upon meeting them
Surprisingly the success rate was exceedingly high
yo i just woke up i feel so weird, and the absolut is still fill, so is the 30, what the fuck did we drink last night man? And will you please come out of the bathroom.
Bro... we didn't even hang out last night??
cannot fit in my clothes. too depressed to drink.
if you drink enough to puke, it's like a weight loss plan.
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
If i could tip my vagina, i would.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
so apparently mom and dad slept together on the first date
i guess it runs in the family.
I come from a long history of big boobed German, Swedish, and Irish women. And then there's me. Mother nature was like "Naaaaaaah."
you're hired as official boob wrangler
I just don't wanna be that girl with no ride and no pants
Must be why he thought choking was foreplay. Like WTF? No.
I'm tired of you and your emotional constipation. WHY DO YOU CLOSE YOUR EYES WHEN WE MAKE LOVE!?
So he apologized for peeing on my floor.. then we fucked all night.
Real classy
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
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