all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
That fat broad you banged out last night is still here and I can hear her snoring through the living room wall. I would leave, but I don't want to come home to an empty fridge.
What do you do when the person in the stall next to you says they're jealous?
I wish they had a smiley of two girls making out
Just saw a guy from Kansas and a guy from Nebraska arguing over who had less of an accent. God Bless the Midwest.
An alarm set every 45 minutes saying "FATTY" and one every afternoon saying "CASPER" every day until spring break is a foolproof plan to being bikini ready
i keep forgetting that not all of my female friends are bisexual.
They put me in charge of something. Why the fuck would you look at me and put me in charge of something while i'm double fisting peach mimosas at a baby shower
I don't think I'd trust a marching band with trampolines to not cause serious damage to themselves/ property.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
Some fat latino guy has these 2 fat white moms making out with each other on the dance floor
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
We need a kiddie pool and lots of cornstarch
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