We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
she took her clothes off and my dick went from =====> to =>
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
I think she kind of thinks she's better than us now ... please. I go to Michigan.
i literally in my bathroom watching tv from across the hall while trying not to fall asleep with my dog keeping my feet warm. wednesday's shouldnt be like this
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
In less than 24 hrs I went from conversing with Nobel Laureate, to hangover vomiting in front of a drive thru cashier
I complimented him on his choice of carpeting while he was humping me.
Here's my first problem: I'm drunk
There's jello in my purse I have a mysterious glow stick and didn't sleep with anyone my god I'm 3 for 3 tonight
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
If there was a build-a-penis, I would build that penis.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
Just fyi there is a naked girl somewhere in your house. I woke up and she was gone, definitely left her clothes tho
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