I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
I went through his pics. Will you go with me to get tested?
Dude! I just figured out I can successfully hide a 4oz flask between my boobs without endangering my cleavage! College: conquered!
Every time you mention the threesome around him I will high five you. Do what you will with this information.
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
he pulled my tampon string out with his teeth like a grenade pin yelling frag out! That's why I fuck guys back from deployment. They'll go the distance
I can't wait to get to LA so I can punch her in the face
I'll be honest, this year's Vegas trip will be nothing short of disappointing if there's no repeat of the angry ménage a trios in a closet.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
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