Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
I have this strange craving to see a really fat person go down a slipnslide
you were stumbling around in your attic looking for all your swim team medals because you wanted to "feel like a champion."
we made malted milkshakes. malt as in malt liqour.
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
So my mom and I were talking about what I should get you for christmas. She made it clear I cannot get christmas lingerie.
Please save me from this creative non fiction class. I just wrote a paper about how I spend unhealthy amounts of time with my cat.
I spend unhealthy amounts of time watching RuPaul's Drag Race.
I referred to the cat as amicable.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Our relationship is representative of a cognitive bias that leads to bad decision making and misplacement of resources. So should we pick up some whiskey tomorrow?
Oh yes there is. Now I'm the sad one. Please organize my life. And I will demoralize yours.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
The awkward moment your booty call shows up to the Mexican restaurant and realizes you just picked burritos over pussy
It started getting weird when you decided to scold my vagina.
Randomize
