I boned her and wore a Freddy mask once. It was pretty lol
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
I do regret it. But I can't unfuck her
This girl I work with, who is 18 btw, invited me to her baby shower. Do they sell abortions in gift certificate form?
Me + Nice restaurant + Copious amounts of booze + obscene comments to couples = valentine's day plans
i just missed the spain goal because i was puking in the bathroom. damn you open bar.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
Just to an Octoberfest and a sex party. Nothing wild.
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
Is it bad I'm drunk at orientation
You've been there for 12 hours, what are you supposed to be doing
Not be drunk
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
If you ever get divorced...would you call me??
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
Randomize
