You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
Pooping in your heated bathroom to the sound of rain and instrumental guitar might be the greatest experience ever.
i would rather give Shaq a handjob than take this accounting final
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
We need somewhere to take these girls. Otherwise it's a orgy in the Mazda.
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Btw. U, me, male strippers, beer. Gonna happen. We could totally get TNT from like u know TNT places
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
I have a magical vagina and I can't deny it anymore
He asked me to come stay with him so he could "see that ass and watch Harry Potter."
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
ya I went to the grocery store literally just for cheese and condoms
You ran full speed into the glass door with your Patron and yelled "FEEL THE RHYTHM, FEEL THE RHYME"
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Randomize
