I'm a grown ass woman and I'm sitting in bed eating pizza at 4:30 a.m. BFD, right?
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
She’s leaving for college so I made her a gift basket with all the essentials. You know- Ramen, a 12 pack of PBR, some leftover Plan B pills and a laminated business card for a good lawyer. Damn I’m a good big sister.
The venue for the new years party is close to the hospital for obvious reasons.
And we won't even have to pay the tab if we die AT the bar. So..win win.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
Well despite the fact that I'm still not entirely sure this isn't an elaborate/cunning plan to kill me, I'm in.
We were so drunk that when I broke the bottom off a pint glass we decided to make it into a candle holder. How does that happen?!
The sound of my own breathing is making my head throb. That hungover.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
Well, I have no idea where my underwear is, so yea I would say it was a good weekend.
I'd kiss your neck and collarbone and then run my tongue up your neck to just behind your ear
And then lightly kick the curve inside your ear
Randomize
