Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
69 is so not fun when his penis is sporting a 70s hairstyle
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
Just came to the realization that what I thought were orgasms were just lightheadedness from hyperventilation. My entire sex life is a lie.
Idk man, most things I eat are even better than I expected. Like when I drunkenly put mac and cheese on a slice of cheese pizza or when I soberly put mac and cheese into a Taco Bell burrito.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
I did not know male screamers existed until now. Good for him. Good for my ego.
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
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