I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
Yeah I said my new jacket was waterproof, not puke through your nose proof.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
I don't know. I just thought I'd put my drinks in my bag and go on an adventure. Like a drunk Bilbo Baggins.
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
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