So it's like pop-o-matic trouble, but with penises
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
She just ended a sentence with "and he doesn't even mind my herpes..."
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
Woke up to my asscrack filled with melted Reese's Pieces. Halloween parties are so weird here man
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
I can smell the sangria seeping out of my pores
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
I mean, "boo" isn't the appropriate response to someone dying...
I'm making mistakes. Coming up with girl now
I hate me. That girl was hiiiiideous.
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
So, what my linguistics project should really be called is "I happen to sleep/makeout with a lot of bilinguals and am now using them to help me graduate"
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
