the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
i freaking love being in a circle of guys. if i fart none of them suspect me.
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
we talked about european history as he fucked me from behind in the shower... i think it was a success
Wouldn't pinatas filled with coke be awesome idea for cinco de mayo?
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
How do you say "I'm not pregnant in Spanish?"
They told me you were taking cheese cube shots and chasing them with barbecue sauce... Is this true?
Whoever was the last to get in from the chinese firedrill had to pay the dealer.
I knew you would eventually ask my secret. Pedialite mix drinks. Works wonders.
the liver wants what the liver wants
Yeah, reverse cow girl. She was on top and I was playing Flappy Bird behind her back. Easiest way to have angry sex.
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
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