I just convinced a girl to drink my spit cup cuz I said it was dark beer and would get her drunk faster. I dare you to try something better.
i love beer. I convinced myself that I'm going to ace the exam tomorrow. I can't even do that when I actually study.
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
Its official. Iv'e been kicked out of a bar in every state. I would like to take my job and travel time for allowing this to happen.
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
I have come to realize that my purpose in life is less musical and more as a filter of alcohol into water.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
he kept insisting he didn't have my number, so i called his phone and my number came up as "yeaaaaaaaaah!"
I was so drunk last night I couldn't see faces, only from the shoulders down.
Did this whole conversation happen while you were shitting?
We need to get me chipped asap
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
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