just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
By the end of the night i was making legitimate noises not just saying moo.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
Let's go get our ovaries removed together. It'll be like bonding by getting mani/pedis, but with more vicodin and less unwanted pregnancies.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
I told him if he wanted to lose weight he had to learn self control. Less than ten minutes after that I ate a cookie off the floor...
Okay, I just got to our real hotel and the YMCA may have been a better choice. A man w/ no shirt on
Cause I'll toss Tabasco sauce in his eyes and yell "Cobra attack" and walk away
It's 4/20 and I spent the morning in the gym and am working later tonight. I don't even have any weed. Why am I adult-ing again?
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
Sexting is killing my work productivity but it's okay because I'm self-employed
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
Randomize
