I just saw a hot homeless man
Well i threw up in my mouth a few times. But i successfully swallowed it. Still going strong.
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
that pic of me and the hulking football player sure does come in handy when creepy guys hit on me at the bar.
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
There's just something classy about smoking a blunt in a prom dress.
Randomize