I'm cheating on the girl I'm cheating on my girlfriend with
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
this is random but who was banging in the shower in our condo?
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
Was in the middle of a keg stand, the frat guys dropped me, and I broke my nose. My mom didn't enjoy that call from the hospital.
This isn't a because its valentines day booty call, it's a because your cock is phenomenal booty call that happens to be on valentines day..
Jesus Christ that hit just spoke to so many levels of my soul. It's caressing them softly
he's annoying when i'm sober but vaguely hot when i'm drunk so yes i do have a preference and it goes by the name of vodka
Randomize
