i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
So I've been thinking a lot since she told me she's prego. But what I want to know is why my voice of reason sounds like Thomas fucking Jane!?
Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
All my problems are solved. I just got McDonalds and scratch off lottery tickets.
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
I had sex with her like 200 times, and she was only pregnant once, those are pretty good statistics.
I need to beat up a magician now. BRB.
I think I've just evolved into some kind of vodka fueled monster
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
he's like crack. I can't be in the same room with him while drunk and not do him.
Randomize
