But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
I hate when people uglier than me have girlfriends
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
Whats the count minus fat chicks?
When we started taking double shots of vodka and chasing it with a lick of fruit roll-ups, I knew there'd be hell to pay in the morning.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
I don't know but someone, somewhere gave someone a hand job and someone else was pissed about it...
Hey I'm not sure why your jacket's covered in maple syrup but I just realized you didn't leave the house earlier wearing a jacket...
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
i keep smelling vagina and donuts, which pretty much sumarises this morning. happy birthday.
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
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