he was so drunk he doesn't remember anything. I have to break up with him all over again
As I was going down on her I noticed she had a tatoo on her inner thigh that said "Eat it like your birthday cake".
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
How many bratwuest were you able to fit in your mouth at one time? It's me, Hans.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
My tongue is raw from licking all that salt with my tequila shots...happy cinco de mayo
I'm craving your dick and a microwave pizza
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
That's the second time the same cop pulled me over well a different girl was giving me road head
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
Randomize
