dude you apologized to her after she called you stupid. you were like "no i'm sorry, you shouldn't have to be around stupid people, it's my fault"
I wish there was a "friends who have gained the most weight since high school" filter on facebook for when I am feeling fat.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
I just feel like a little gay dolphin in a massive sea
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
All I need is the Internet and a place to drink.
I'm going to make a mold of my tits to bake a cake for him for our anniversary.. I can see the pride in his eyes now.
Monday morning margarita madness at ny house. Yes before wheel of fortune. Yes day drinking.
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
Coming to you live from the floor of my office..
I've realized that I'm going to have to wake and bake every morning to make it through the summer without killing someone. This is ridiculous.
Something about the fact that I could do coke off her ass cheeks just speaks to me
It's pretty self explanatory. You tried to have sex on the hood of a car in front of everyone
Unless it involves a lot of whiskey, an ACDC concert, and a guy named Juan from the Philippines, then I'm not interested.
Remember that Czech tennis player I brought home from beer pong and banged on your couch last year? He just booty calle me. From the Czech Republic.
Randomize
