I just had human shit waiting for me at the top of the escalator at Bowery. This is truly the Lord's day.
May the Lord look upon you in favor and give you pees.
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
Do I not have a Brazilian bc of my boyfriend situation or do I not have a boyfriend bc of my brazilian situation?
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
My vag is like the Sahara
Ew that's gross.
The sad truth. Barren and empty.
EW HE JUST SNAPPED ME A NUDE BUT HE CENSORED HIS DICK BY COLORING IT I DID NOT ASK FOR THIS
I have a spatula mark on my ass. He spanked me with a spatula. Take that Rachel Ray.
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
please tell dad to clear the porn off his tablet before he lends it to anyone from now on
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
It's so obvious he's evil. I mean, would a non-evil person have facial hair like that?
Randomize
