? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
I just woke up my dad to tell him that i made out with the drummer. He wasnt as excited as I was.
I wasn't fucked. I was just drunk, because i was still able to walk into the woods and masterbate.
he suggested we appoligize to eachother. then do blow and painkillers & have ourselves a make-up party.
We got a 5L jug of wine for 3 Euro. Italy was a good choice.
Ugh he's texting me.
Tell him you're no longer interested in what he has to offer; his shitty personality outweighs his sexual prowess.
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
You were ¾ of the way through the first pitcher of margaritas then you turned to me and said "Wow I can barely taste the vodka!" And then…….
...Then...
Then I told you margaritas are made with tequila not vodka. You whipped the pitcher at the wall and ordered another one
Dude I'm at a Marijuana dispensary party. They are giving away BAGS of edibles
How do you keep ending up in these situations?
My dad is their accountant
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
I am a bad person
You slept with him. Was it good?
I wasnt going to but I was too lazy to blow up the air mattress
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
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