My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
you can't just make up for the fact that you broke up with me by tagging yourelf in my embarrassing facebook videos of you
Hu mahhiw im so tired.i just got done. In fo dleepu. Aaaaaaahh. I qisj my mom filmed me. In axtunf so funny
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
Will you please bring your dog over today? Apparently I was drunkenly cooking last night. There's food everywhere. I'm too hungover to clean.
Dont make this weird.... I was wondering if I could paper mache a few of your dildos this weekend?
The sad thing is; I'm getting used to walking around feeling like I could hurl at any minute.
am i new drunk or am i still drunk
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
Went up to some dude that hit on Laura and told him he has a voice like a grandma. Apparently didnt have muscles or kindness like grandma so can you pick me up at the ER please?
You just kept looking down at your tits and screaming "I LOVE YOU TWO!!!"
Please wake up and help me figure out how I woke up on the floor with my head under the couch
Randomize
