That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
the not having weed thing wouldnt be nearly as tragic if it wasnt the one holiday where they launch bright flaming things into the air
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
But today feels so special with katie getting herpes and me cleaning my room. Good things are happening.
I let my cat eat the pepperonis off of my pizza while I was still eating it. That's the level of tequila drunk I got last night.
God I adore you.
The drag queen we did coke with is going to be on Ru Paul's drag race. I feel so proud.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
Randomize
