You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
I seriously love my fucking boobs. They are so boobs.
Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
i wanted to ask her what his dick looked like but i thought that would be weird for the first time i met her
He needs to respect me before he can fuck me with cat ears on.
You don't seem to appreciate the rareness of his junk.
Send me a picture. I'm more of a visual learner.
I remember you licked my face and said that's all you're getting
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
Listen, I booty called my boss last night from the company phone. I may need to brush up my resume.
Rock bottom: having sex rejected while your boyfriend talks in his sleep as you stuff your face with Girl Scout cookies
Doing the walk of shame from the back of a Jeep to the porta potty it's parked next to while your dad watches is not what you want.
Memeber that time you got detained in Poland. We don’t talk about that enough
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Randomize
