and i forgot to tell you that my armpit hair is now completely grown back. man i love winter.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
oh god all I remember is forward rolls down the corridor and all I have to show for it is "fit Romanian guy" saved in my phone
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
FYI your bra is now hanging in the hallway as a trophy.
Got cut off last night cuz this chick had her hands down my shorts and was blatantly playing with my dick while I was trying to order. apparently that's "frowned upon"
You should frame my arrest warrant.
When Dad gets to your house, ask him about the sound of anal beads. Happy Thanksgiving!
I need to stop waking up with no pants on.
what happened this time
I dont know everyone was gone and there was a bird in the room
All I remember is an overwhelming desire for chicken nuggets...
Yes, you pinned my brother to the floor by the throat and threatened to slaughter his family if he didn't drive to mcdonalds and get you some.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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