She was walking with the authority that 2 beers gave to a light weight.
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
Today in psych we learned that you are a whore.
Me specifically?
Yep.
I returned her cell phone that I found in the bathroom, I felt the stretcher and the ambulance was enough of a learning experience.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
Just got to Evans to buy weed. His mom showed up unannounced. Now the three of us are chillen. Super.
I talked to the pizza guy for 10 minutes about my truck, I don't even have a truck
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
I feel like hooking up with you on my floor, sneaking out my window and jumping a fence is an effort that deserves a happy birthday.
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