Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
literally followed a trail of condoms to the bus stop this morning. Ahh modern-day bread crumbs
Having sex with the stobe light on was the best bad idea I've ever had.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
Court can wait. right now you and your magic penis need to be here satisfying me.
I don't know, I kept pretending that I was riding an elephant during. It was actually really fun, but you can't tell him that!
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
Randomize
