Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
couldnt find a condom. used a surgical glove instead. actually worked and the sex was great. thanks nursing school
I love watching the kids I sold drugs to score touchdowns
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
I think it's time we have the "weird fetish" talk.
Did we literally take a cab across the street
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
somedays, I wish the drugs you give me would convince me they were a bad idea preingestion.
where's the fun in that?
Think of where it's been though. That Dr. Suess book, "Oh the Places You'll go" was written for his penis.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
She carried my bag of puke down the aisle and the flight attendant wouldn't move the beverage cart so she put the puke bag in the flight attendant's face and said "I have a bag of sickness!" I've never seen a cart move that fast.
Dude. Why is there a hamster in my pocket? WHAT THE FUCK WAS IN THAT JOINT
It's 3:30pm, I've been out of bed for an hour and spent most of that barfing. We're switching to beer next debate.
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
Uber southern baptist grandma and uber flaming cousin just got into an argument about whether jesus is OK with gay marriage. Aren't these things only supposed to happen at Thanksgiving?
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