How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
Dude. She told me she felt bad for not giving me more blojobs. HOW COULD THAT HAVE GONE BETTER?
I just dumped out my gym water bottle and filled it with white wine. This is the end.
he turned two sober chicks into 7 drunken girls...he's my hero
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
Shout out to my liver for being the true MVP. It easily put in more work than LeBron or Curry this week.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
I WOULD NEVER MIX DICK AND MCDONALDS
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
Randomize