super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
saw a man at the beach in a red speedo. when he rolled over he unintentionally displayed a HUGE skid mark.
He used his penis as a puppet and sang Rihanna's Hard..... so no, we will never see each other again.
I'm slightly possesive over the gucamole when i'm stoned.
Is that why you left peanut shells in my bed?
my revenge plans when i'm high are never as good as i think they are
Accidentally gagged on my toothbrush and puked up a Walgreen's cheeseburger. 1) I am not going to be on top of my game tonight. 2) Since when do I have a gag reflex? 3) Walgreen's cheeseburgers are awesome.
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
I dont think ive ever had a drunk day betray me so hard before
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
No offense, I mean I'm sure you rocked my world and all but I don't remember.
You 2012 self promised me that you would do LSD with me, and it's 2015 now. So.
Plus, I'm basically a doctor, so what could go wrong.
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
She did NOT find it funny to come upstairs to find me with the word "MISERY" written on my forehead in magic marker and the label to the vodka bottle replaced with a scrap of paper taped around that says "COMPANY"
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Randomize