what are u so afraid of ive smelled ur poop before
woke up in a shopping cart using a keystone box as a blanket. how was your night?
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
I mean i can't really be mad...either way i was gonna fuck him or hate fuck him, so it's basically a win/win situation.
So I thought the party was crazy before his pinky came off...
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
She got drunk on the air plane and pretended to be an elephant for an hour...Atleast the kid behind us enjoyed it.
he pushed me in the lake knowing full well I had joints on me. that's drug-abuse!!
Bobbing for jello shots in a bucket of long island. Fast track to alcohol poisoning.
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
Randomize
