but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
the sex wasnt even worth changing my sheets
im holly from the hills drunk
EVERYONE CAN HEAR YOU FUCKING YOU ARE IN A TENT
In my drunkeness I was planning how to throw up without my parents hearing. I was gonna go for a "run" and just throw up outside.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
You is good. You is important. You is a slut.
Option 1: fuck me and bedtime. Option 2: come fuck me and then hangout with everyone. Option 3: don't fuck me in which case fuck you.
My little brother found me on Instagram. If I'm not already the shame of my family, I'm about to be.
I make him buy me all the extremely expensive high end Mac cosmetics I desire. Wear it then let him cum on my face. I am fucking glamorous.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
Just went to court for a citation. Guess who my DA was? That girl I ATM'd last weekend. No ticket for me!
I'm supposed to be at work in 10 min, I just woke up and am 45 min away...tinder for the win
Public service announcement: Just bc it is Margarita Monday does NOT mean your stomach will readily accept that much alcohol. There IS a reason it isn't called Magical Monday. On that note, better luck on Tequila Tuesday.
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
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