Is it bad to mix sunny d with vodka if i dont have any real OJ?
I've mixd ketchup with vodka before and called it a bloody mary, so, no.
So his roomate was eating breakfast when I was sneaking out. He's the guy I took home from jessicas wedding. I ended up eating coco puffs with him
Just another sign I need to get out of this town
don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
So if we break up over this are you still gonna come over and do my dishes?
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
We are making a pool on how long he stays sober this time you want in?
I woke up in your kitchen with my ID in my hand and my nails were painted electric blue. Dude.... never let me have fireball again.
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
WTF DOES CAROLINE HAVE GLASS IN HER FACE
where are my pants?
in the oven.
Randomize
