My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
There is no way he is gay with that hair.
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
I like how you try to look sexy and just end up looking like a weird boy.
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
Just asked my dog if he was proud of me for making it home. That drunk.
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
My dad picked me up from the bus station and as soon as he saw me he yelled "bus backwards is SUB!" and started laughing, I'm like 800% sure he's stoned. I'm so happy I came home for spring break.
I think I died last night.
Yeah, you got carried home
The girl in the stall next to me is puking her brains out, I'd say she had just a good a weekend as us
I gave her some alkaseltzer ad she looked at me lke I was god
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
I haven't showered. And am sitting in the office smelling like a beer can someone's been using as an ash tray.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
THERE IS WATER LITERALLY DRIPPING OFF OF THE CHANDELIER. I OFFICIALLY HAVE THE WORLD'S WORST RAINFALL SHOWER HEAD.
Randomize
