we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
YES please come visit. Lets go get belligerent. I won't even pepperspray you
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
I'm going to tell you a beautiful word.
Fellatio.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
It wasn't my fault.
You let her suck your neck. Yes it was your fault.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
27 year olds can still do oral in a car right? Or is that trashy?
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