I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
She put her phone in her underwear and it somehow managed to work it's way into her vagina. she has a BLACKBERRY.
funny how all you have to say is "i'm infertile" and boys are stoked on you
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
I wiped my blood on their walls screaming "IT'S NOT MY SECURITY DEPOSIT!"
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
In other words, he somehow found his way to my apartment, wasted, and was naked on my new couch. Completely naked. It was too special to pass up.
He said he doesnt believe in the female orgasm,so no I did not have sex with him.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
My nose was gushing blood and he just kept screaming "she took it like a champ" to everyone there. Plus side though, bartender felt bad for me and gave me a free drink.
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
Holy shit, we're married as fuck.
And tell your penis that we can hang out tonight for sure.
Randomize
