I am engaged
To a real live girl that has met me
Blind date just said "Can't wait till I'm married so i can let myself go". There will be no second date.
no one will drink with you if you continue to listen to beyonce
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
Very nice. It looks like a Fisher-Price My First Dildo, but still very nice.
I'm just gonna ignore the fact that I have no pants on and find a way home. A good one-nighter never goes back for his pants.
We love you just as you are but we might love you more if we didn't have to post bail so often...
Another day, another engagement, another cat
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
You're the only person I know who would go to New Jersey to give a blowjob and I have so much respect for you for it
It's obvious you're hotter. You've been doing a married guy for almost 2 years.
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