I think the recipie for awesome sauce is butter and semen
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
I woke up with a flask of whiskey and a mason jar full of sausage in my tux jacket. south georgia is where i belong
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
Well obviously when I get drunk my intelligence level surpasses yours and that's why you can't understand me.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
What's the standard Christmas present for six months of booty calls?
Mobile recharge?
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
Every little girl dreams of the day when she picks up her fuck buddy because he's drunk at the gay bar again.
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
we talked about the guy being eaten by the anaconda.. Then I proceeded to blow him
Just test drove the kilt for Justin's wedding. NEVER. WEARING. PANTS. AGAIN.
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
Randomize
