i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
There's a middle eastern man wearing a cow costume with tequila coming out of his udders, but I'm not sober enough to feel uncomfortable with it.
Our innocent game of 'Duck, duck, booze.' ended up not being so innocent
i decided this morning while eating my breakfast of red bull and cold pizza that i should take a vow of celibacy
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
On the other hand, this could be a new level of shame for me.
They found me wandering around campus screaming body shots over and over again wrapped in a curtain
I ended up changing her contact in my phone to "O Great Potato".
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
He struggled for a second trying to unhook my bra and I said "4/10. Novice."
i just drunk stumbled into my home... to figure out that we moved 2 weeks ago..
You've got the chocolate, drugs and my pants. You hold all the cards...
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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