I have a new suitor he got my # last nite... I was to tipsy to function! What was I thinking!! It's like u when u first met me
just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
I want to drop kick Stephanie Meyer
you spelled her name wrong
not you too!!
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
Don't be alarmed at the kitchen mess. I had to shoot the fire extinguisher on the toaster oven, one quick blast. It was a matter of safe over sorry.
I'll probably just close my eyes and point to a random name. That will be my vote.
I just realised how much we're failing the women's suffrage movement right now.
My clothes are covered in blood and I feel like I drank a gallon of elephant cum...it's safe to say I'm hungover
how many dildos make it a "collection?"
That bitch makes my crazy look like a walk in the park with cotton candy
It was so cute that he apologized for getting cum on my couch. If he realized how many guys had cum on that couch in the past year, he wouldn't have touched my vagina with a 10-ft pole.
I fail to see the problem of enjoying a glass of wine while I poop...
the point I'm tryimg to make is that you didn't need to take the whole box in with you
So apparently there is enough alcohol to get me to agree to going to a strip club, but when I have enough they don't let me in.
you just won the triple crown of sex! your prize is more sex.
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
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