Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
New rule: no balls on the kitchen counter.
We just followed a woman home because she looked like Jeff Goldblum. Turns out she lives in a trailer park.
We just took shots out of seashells. Welcome spring break 10.
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
Apparently one comment in my womens studies class cockblocks yourself for an entire semester.
i just remembered the time you guys tried to give me an intervention because i was drunk before 5 on a monday
at one point he couldn't find his underwear so he put on my catsuit to go to the bathroom
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
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