Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
The parties out here are fucking awesome and I've got the grades to prove it.
I found the pot of gold last night, and it was full of bad decisions.
I'm also annoyed at my horoscope for not warning me of my perils
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
After hearing her fall down in the shower for the third time, I decided to go check on her.
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
Apparently I taped knives to my hands and made everyone call me wolverine
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
Randomize