I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
Ive never seen someone more dtf than a soaking wet drunk girl who stumbles into your backyard.
Fuck him tonight for the both of us. We're still tag-teaming in spirit.
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
Maybe I don't remember every single thing... I think there's a hi lighter treasure map drawn on my arm...
I just found it. I hope it leads to food.
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
I feel like a Europe failure cause I'm coming home from the club at 3:30 and so many people are just arriving... Wtf? 3:30am People! Drink earlier!
It's a Tuesday.
Well his dad was his wingman, so I had to fuck him. I didnt want his dad to think that he was doing a bad job and I was drunk enough to think he was doing a good job.
Score one for dad.
Trying to put a fitted sheet on drunk is one of the boss levels of slutty adulthood.
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
High me is so sweet. She left not-high me a fortune from a fortune cookie and 6 packets of soy sauce in my tampon drawer.
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