I met the nicest Tranny last night. He/She loves Cheetos.
I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
they just dont make restraining orders like they used to.
So i told my advisor i had to drop the class bc the prof said "supposably" and "irregardless" within the 1st 10 minutes of the 1st class; she agreed with me that dropping it was the best choice
we are cooking lunchables pizzas on a fire pit.
$22.99 left in the bank til payday = 3($7 jack & coke) + 2($0.89 T-Bell taco) + $0.21 in case of emergency.
math is fun
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
I KNOW. I'm like, ew who are these ppl. And then I remember I'm traveling to New York to accidentally hook it with two different dudes in one weekend.
I want to say that being forced to stare at the 'no.1 boyfriend' collage behind his head ruined the sex but it just didn't.
It's never too late to be topless.
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
I don't think you understand what laundry day means. I am wearing a swimsuit as underwear and my spanish club tshirt from junior high
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
Randomize
